DRY SHAMPOO AND ME: A MEMOIR

You may not remember but, believe me, there was a time when only shampoo, baby powder and Pssst existed. You read that correctly. In the not-so-distant past one either showered with actual water or dumped pre-historic powder onto their scalps in an attempt to avoid any resemblance to Kellyann Conway or a Greyhound bus station dweller. I'm guilty as charged and spent many years with a head of hair that smelled like an infant's ass, post fresh diaper change. 

At some point, in some faraway boardroom, someone got the idea that it would be profitable to make a dry shampoo that worked and actually smelled good or even better, not at all. States with water shortages (I'm looking at you, California) rejoiced! Just kidding - these dry shampoos were mostly packaged in aerosol canisters! "Al Gore loses again, mwahhhhaaaa," said Donald J. Trump to Scott Pruitt.

Meanwhile, back in New York, I fell into a little bit of a depression at the same time I decided to get a lob haircut. Dry shampoo and Netflix became important staples in my bid to appear as though I wasn't about to take flight over the cuckoo's nest Translation: I know Dry Shampoo and am prepared to help you also get to know Dry Shampoo, should you ever experience a drought or a depression. 

Here are my favorites found via extensive shower abstinence (Sidenote: shouldn't Netflix have a category called Not Even Dry Shampoo Will Save Me Now?! Movie recommendations would include Schindler's List, The Hours, Up, Big Fish, etc).

Dry Shampoo_ProductsShot.JPG

From Left to Right (also from Least Expensive to Most Expensive):

  • Not Your Mother's Clean Freak Refreshing Dry Shampoo ($6) - This is my standby, everyday dry shampoo. It can make me happy even in the darkest of times. Why? Well, it is cheap, the can is gigantic, there is an unscented version, it absorbs oil effectively without making hair feel like straw and it is easy to find (Walgreen's, CVS, Target, etc.). 
  • Klorane Dry Shampoo with Oat Milk ($20) - This dry shampoo is gentle on my hair which means it doesn't dry out my scalp and it doesn't make combing through my fine and tangled hair an absolute massacre. It doesn't leave a heavy white cast and while it doesn't add volume to strands, it doesn't weight them down either. 
  • Bumble and Bumble Bb Prêt-à-Powder ($27) - This dry shampoo is one I use for the specific task of adding volume to hair not to mop up oil from second day hair. Application is key. Repeat after me: "Never apply this powder to the top layer of hair!" If you do, hop right back into the shower because the white cast isn't coming out. To add volume you begin at the under part of you head, make sections and sprinkle at the scalp. Rub the powder into the scalp line with your fingers, flip the next section over it and repeat. Your hair will double in volume. And, the powder smells light and clean.
  • Sachajuan Dry Powder Shampoo ($35) - I hesitated to include this product because the brand, Sachajuan, is difficult to find. Sephora carries the mini version, Barney's and Dermstore carry the full size version but other than that, I seem to find this Swedish hair care brand in smaller boutiques. This fresh-smelling formula adds volume and absorbs oil like many other brands but also adds shine and life to my dull hair. Just be sure to shake REALLY well before spraying.  I'd be lying if I didn't admit it's one of my favorite branding/packaging designs out there.  I've always been partial to Swedes, though.... If you do decide to purchase, Dermstore offers 20% off and free shipping if you add your email to their subscriber list.
  • Oribe Dry Texturizing Spray ($46) - How can I describe the elation and shame that comes with using this product? Remember that time you bought a roll of Pillsbury cookie dough with the promise of only eating one scoop a night yet coming to a few hours later with the empty plastic roll around your snout and the blood sugar levels of a serious diabetic? Or that time in 2001 you vowed to only have a few drinks at an open-bar birthday party, but with 20 minutes to go placed an order for 5 vodka sodas at once. The night ended with you throwing up out of a cab window while crying about that one scene in E.T. that still tugs at your heart strings. This range of emotions is what I feel every time I buy and use Oribe Dry Texturizing Spray. I see it on the shelf and my heart beat accelerates, adrenaline pumps through my body. I purchase it and quickly feel shame at spending money I could have used to adopt an orphan in a third-world country for two months. I spray it in my hair and my scalp rejoices with imaginary incantations of Handel's Hallelujah! I finish the can in less than three weeks and begin the shame spiral over again. Why do I put myself through this? The mist is exquisite and disperses the finest veil of product on my head. It is scented with a lightly floral fragrance that dissipates in a few minutes and the formula isn't heavy or starchy. In short, this stuff turns my hair from Hole-era Courtney Love to Gisele Bundchen in three sprays or less.